49 WAYS TO IDENTIFY THAT YOU ARE REALLY BRUNEIAN

Nowadays there is lots of con citizenship in Brunei. Therefore some researchers have been selected and identified (after working hard) to ensure that nobody will copy of citizenship of Bruneian. After the research done they have been identified some character of Bruneian. There are:

1. You 'miss call' instead of calling or sending sms.

2. You always say "kapih ku.. bila terima/keluar gaji/overtime/elaun ah?"

3. You park your car as close as possible to your destination area.

4. You speak Malaysia if you meet Malaysian, speak Indonesia if you meet Indonesian.. and so on.

5. You are asked to go to a "meeting" but actually you will only be "listening".

6. You go to someone's wedding, you give money using an envelope and put your name on it or if you think you don't give enough you use a blank envelope.

7. Indo mee is your staple food and Ayamku is your fastfood.

8. The term 'balik kampung' is almost not applicable.. since you can 'balik kampung' everyday.

9. Motorcyles and bicycles are not your transport, they are your sport.

10. When you see local tv camera around you during the day, then at night you will watch local news... and hoping to see yourself on television.

11. You drive your car on wavy and potholed road.

12. You receive official news faster by mean of "mouth" than by "written".

13. You like electronic products from Japan.

14. If you have the chance to call a radio show and before you are asked to hang-up, you say 'boleh minta putarkan lagu?'

15. You are in BIG debts and refuse to pay the lenders and yet still drive a CLK and live in a mansion.

16. You wear baju kurung with large katoks and maniks all over.

17. You are loud and speak in melandih way.

18. You and the whole family have the same car plate numbers.

19. You spend your $$$$$ on your wedding even though you are broke.

20. You become Akademi Fantasia fanatics.

21. You know most of the people here - "eh si anak si anu eh saudara si blabla".

22. You drive to the shop next door even though the shop is only 100 meters away (except maybe in Kampung Ayer).

23. Every year, since the 80s until last year, you don't want not to miss HM's Birthday Titah (because you are hoping that HM will increase your salary).

24. When you want to get some service from the government agencies, you will find your saudara first.

25. If something goes wrong, you will say that one of the datos, pehins is your relative (or at least they know you).

26. You cannot live without Brudirect's HYS.

27. You give you children super long name.

28. You rush to a new shopping mall just to beat everybody else even though it's just another Hua Ho.

29. You wave your hand while driving to other drivers that you know.

30. You are able to pay (or not) for one or two amahs who are most likely an Indonesian or a Filipino.

31. You are ok to be fat.

32. You are a busy body with other peoples' news, especially the bad ones, and you think your responsibility is to know and to spread it around.

33. Your friends get married on the same day and you don't know who to go to.

34. You like to stare at phones for 24 hours and chat on MSN.

35. You say "Mun paham bisai" (this needs no further explaination) .

36. You have to wear 'cool' attire everywhere, even on holidays.

37. You add "BUI" on each sentence.

38. You think exercising, being hyper active, competition are for little kids.

39. You can't type or spell properly properly, example "hw r u? hy my nme s si org brnui"

40. You add "me & you" on your converstations with your girl mates.

41. You listen to Pelangi FM.

42. You think fake Von Dutch products are the best.

43. You are especially racist to Indian workers.

44. You would rather go to shopping malls than hanging out at parks, having a picnic with your friends.

45. You have 'candas' in your house.

46. You read this blogsite because all your friends are reading it and you don't want to be left behind.

47. You rush to get a $99 handphone not caring about the limited features coz you think anything cheap is a bargain.

48. You have two handphones - one for DST and the other for BMobile(for one month and then switch off one or the other).

49. You always try to runding the policemen who caught you speeding.


By Gunung ganang

49 MORE WAYS TO IDENTIFY THAT YOU ARE REALLY BRUNEIAN

50. You add many more ways to identify that you are really Bruneian..

51. You won't want to pay for $1 or $2 parking but you will drive your car and go round and round for hours at the shopping mall just to get free parking.

52. You will rush to collect Zakat while driving with a Merz, Beamer, Gold chain around your body but in vain in the end when you were found not the rightful owner of the Zakat.

53. You always nose-pick in front of the public.

54. Obese is trendy but not a health problem.

55. Its ok for your kids to eat junk food at the School canteen and drink coke everyday.

56. You will rush to the wholesale retail shop to purchase very very cheap kerupuk and minuman kutak for your kids to bring to school everyday. Yuck!!..

57. You came in style and trendy at the mall looking handsome and pretty cute but the world viewed your style as unknown and alienated clothings.

58. You would blast the whole Brunei with loud music inside your car just to show-off your system but viewed by many people as damaging your eardrum and jual CD kah?, bah berapa harganya? kah kah kah kah…

59. You will construct many round-abouts with less costly investment only to be caught that the round-abouts as failing road infrastructure system in the world.

60. You will penalised the SME street hawking by bulldozing their businesses and not giving a place to carry out their businesses..

61. You will make the road higher instead of widening it just to finish the annual budget..

62. You will construct highways with zero lightings, no service road and no SOS phones.

63. You will construct residential areas and playfround and left the grass becomes lalang whereby snakes grew up comfortably but only to cut the grass before the once yearly celebration..

64. You will drive your stupid car to the beach where beach strollers, joggers, families are scary to be knockdown..

65. You will tour other country and shop till broke.

66. You will tour other country and showing off your lavish lifestyle to others..

67. You will rabut2 makan during any wedding ocassion and bringing Hua Ho plastic bags to fill the left-over food on the table wihtout the mercy of others.

Brilliant idea from Gunung ganang...